Vintage TV Guide: Fall Preview 1989

In this TV Guide post, we’ll do something a bit different. Rather than look at each day’s schedule, let’s take a glance at the Fall Preview section. It’s 1989 (September 9th – 15th, to be exact), and, from the looks of things, television has gone to shit. Take a gander at the coming attractions for the Fall of ’89 and see for yourself…

 

TV Guide Fall Preview 1989

 

Basically a rip-off of Candid Camera, but without the charm… and without my favorite pervert, Alan Funt.

 

TV guide Fall Preview 1989

 

Yes, this is where COPS began, and it’s still kickin’ today. The novelty of seeing dirty crackheads getting chased by out-of-shape officers, just never gets old.

 

TV Guide Fall Preview 1989 4

 

Oh my God, I’d forgotten about this drivel. Apparently, it was a revamp of an equally awful sitcom, Duet. Say what you will about the preachy Norman Lear sitcoms of the seventies, they at least had substance.

 

anything but love

 

Yeesh. I watched this stuff. What was wrong with me? Surely there was something better to do than watch Anything but Love? I had friends, I was in college, I lived in Southern California…. yet, there I sat, watching this garbage. Go figure.

 

quantum leap

 

I completely understand why people like this show; however, I just was never able to get into it. It wasn’t for lack of trying; it just didn’t do it for me.

 

TV Guide Fall Preview 1989

 

Diane Sawyer the “sexy, savvy former co-editor of 60 Minutes.” Sexy?

 

living dolls tv show

 

Living Dolls – Don’t remember there being a spinoff of Who’s the Boss? And it starred Halle Berry.

Life Goes On – Who doesn’t love the affable Corky Romany, the Down’s Syndrome kid who brings such wisdom and joy to his family and high school classmates?…. Me, that’s who.

 

TV Guide Fall Preview 1989

 

Grieco was Johnny Depp’s replacement on 21 Jump Street as I recall…. and as I also recall, I couldn’t stand this SOB. He was supposed to be tough because had holes in his jeans, but he looked and acted like Zoolander.

 

free spirit tv show

 

So, they hire a witch for a housekeeper…. and the yawnfest begins. Not edgy, not intelligent, not funny, not original, not well acted, and not… renewed for a second season. But it did have Alyson Hannigan.

 

TV Guide Fall Preview 1989

 

Just kill me now.

homeroom tv show

 

I have no memories of this show whatsoever. It could have been underappreciated genius – I’ll never know.

TV Guide Fall Preview 1989

 

Another piece of shit. I know I sound overly harsh; but, if you look back at other TV posts, I positively gush over programming from the seventies, and even early eighties. For me, the networks were really laying turds by the end of the eighties…. which is why, I believe, Seinfeld caught on- it was so different from this garbage.

 

TV Guide Fall Preview 1989 14

 

Whoah! A sitcom directed by Wes Craven? I had no idea this existed. Starring pedophile Jeffery Jones as well!

 
TV Guide Fall Preview 1989 15

 

Social commentary disguised as sci-fi. Sometimes that’s a good thing… and, in this case, not so much.

 

TV Guide Fall Preview 1989

 

I don’t remember this show, but I understand it wasn’t so bad. The pilot is supposed to be hilarious, and it won a few Emmys. But, unfortunately, no one watched and it was cancelled after 20 episodes. Jane Sibbett looks hot; might be worth a watch.

 
TV Guide Fall Preview 1989

 

Another show I routinely watched. It wasn’t so bad, but pretty standard fare. Unsolved Mysteries was much better.

 

TV Guide Fall Preview 1989 18

 

A werewolf private eye…. and you dared to doubt that TV had fallen off a cliff in the late 80s?

 

TV Guide Fall Preview 1989

 

Lynn Redgrave and Jackie Mason – possibly television’s all time worst couple.

 

TV Guide Fall Preview 1989 20

Nope.

TV Guide Fall Preview 1989 21
 

Just read this description. Nothing I can say will do it justice. This is what the bottom of the barrel looks like, folks.

 

TV Guide Fall Preview 1989

 

Hated Doogie. And the Nut House – how was this not amazing? It’s the work of Mel Brooks and the dude behind Sledgehammer, and it stars comic legends Korman and Leachman….. this should have been incredible!

 

TV Guide Fall Preview 1989

 

Hey look, it’s Josh Brolin!

 

Baywatch TV Guide Fall Preview 1989

 

Two shows that need no introduction: one with the Hoff, the other with the Urkel. Both stupid as the day is long, and both wildly popular.

 

TV Guide Fall Preview 1989

 
Yawn.

 

Well, that’s it for what’s coming in Fall of ’89, As you can see, the world was in desperate need of Seinfeld and Friends. The big guns of the 80s were over or on their last leg: Rosanne, Cheers and Cosby… and this was their replacement? When the best in the batch may be Doogie Howser, you know there’s a problem.

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